Friday, 18 December 2009

Fronting... To be or not to be?





SILLY POST!! :-)

…So it would be good to first and foremost understand the concept of “fronting”. Fronting otherwise referred to as “forming” is a situation whereby an individual (most usually but not exclusively of the female specie) feels it necessary to act uninterested in a guy that she is (most often) interested in, in order to appear coy/shy/demure/innocent/unmoved by the said attention. In addition individuals arguably use this technique to make the interested party even more interested (!) or as a technique to “up” their individual value hence not being regarded as cheap.

A lot of girls would admit to having used this technique in the past, present or future. I myself have been known to be amongst the guilty (although that is still debatable). You see, ladies especially from my part of the world are encouraged to allow the man do the “chasing”. Doing things otherwise, people used to say (well some still say) is a shameless act of desperation! “Oh let him sweat before you agree to even give him your name” “make him wait, he would value you more”.

I know some individuals have perfected the art of fronting. Even if they are dying under with “love” for the interested party, they would absolutely refuse to show it but rather remain aloof to keep the poor person in suspense. Some see it as a power trip – whoever caves in first, loses! I know some people wait for the other to say “I miss you” “I love you” first so they don’t appear too keen and also to re-affirm their position as having the upper hand in a relationship.

I don’t mean to sound too harsh because indeed not all cases are extreme and negative. But sometimes I’m confused on what to think. What’s the real deal? Is it better to play the hard-to-get game or plunge straight in and be honest from the get? Does fronting equate to being dishonest, and is that not bad for a starting (is that a word? Lol) relationship? Also, it’s of concern to me that some people have abused the innocent and clean art of fronting that even when you are ABSOLUTELY NOT interested in the guy/girl, he/she is thinking “oh she’s just fronting/playing hard to get!”.. Oh I have quite a number of stories to that end. Sometimes such people would not go away except by praying and fasting! Is it not funny that it’s usually the ones that you really would NOT have anything to do with who stay the longest??

There’s the story of this guy who used to live close to me a while back whom I first met in church and all. We became friends but then he wanted more than that to which I refused. But this guy p.e.r.s.i.s.t.e.d! In return, I kept constant in saying no, but I guess he was thinking “just wait a few more weeks, she would come round”. Well this one didn’t quite “come round” oo. So after some time and I thought he had (almost) forgotten about going into a relationship, he said he wanted to talk to me. When we got talking, he said “see, I don’t like the way this relationship is going. We don’t spend time together etc etc” In my mind I was like “You what?? Are you having a laugh mate?” I didn’t know whether to laugh or be angry or just stare at him in amazement. Needless to say, I was (very) speechless!! So you see, moral of the story - you can actually be in a relationship with someone and not have a clue about it! lol

Monday, 14 December 2009

Because...

Hiya,

I saw this lovely post by T.D Jakes. I'm guessing that many people might have seen this (which is good enough) but for those who haven't or for anyone who needs a little reminding, here goes!

"BECAUSE" by TD Jakes

Just because no one has been fortunate enough to realize
what a gold mine you are,
Doesn't mean you shine any less.

Just because no one has been smart enough to figure out
that you can't be topped,
Doesn't stop you from being the best.

Just because no one has come along to share your life,
Doesn't mean that day isn't coming.

Just because no one has made this race worthwhile,
Doesn't give you permission to stop running.

Just because no one has realized how much of an
awesome woman you are,
Doesn't mean they can affect your femininity.

Just because no one has shown up who can love you on your level, Doesn't mean you have to sink to theirs.

Just because you deserve the very best there is,
Doesn't mean that life is always fair.

Just because God is still preparing your king,
Doesn't mean that you're not already a Queen.

Just because your situation doesn't seem to be progressing right now, Doesn't mean you need to change a thing.

Keep shining, keep running, Keep hoping, and keep praying,
Keep being exactly what you are already. COMPLETE!!

Saturday, 12 December 2009

Get it Right!

New Post, New Post!! (Big Grin)
I'm always glad to come back to blog on here although it's becoming increasingly difficult. i woud like to share a bit of myself here (I guess that's part of what blogging is about - opening up and sharing with people your thoughts and brain child).

There's a saying I heard/read once that I really like and that is "A foolish man learns from his own mistakes and a wise man learns from the mistakes of others". I remember when I read that, I thought to myself "yeah, that makes sense and I definitely one to be the wise one" hence I made up my mind to try as much as possible to watch carefully and learn from others who have gone through stuff that I may be able to avoid such. On the other hand, another popular saying goes "experience is the best teacher" ergo, sometimes the best way to know what it feels like or to learn a lesson is to have a taste of it - you never know what heat is until you go near or touch fire.

For me, both sayings are quite apt, my life is a combination of both; in some cases, I have seen things happen to people or people do stuff in certain ways with bad or good results and I have either avoided or embraced it while in other cases, I have had to go through some things for me to fully appreciate it.

So enough with the philosophy, what exactly is my point.. Well, I hope in the next couple of posts to share a bit of my relationship story (s). You see one thing I have realised is that as a young Christian lady, it is sometimes so difficult to have a "Christian" relationship in today's world and in many cases, you compromise - either in a "big" way or in a "minor" way. For many people, our desire is to do it God's way, but time and time again even the best of Christians miss it and it's only after it doesn't work out that you think to yourself "What was I thinking???"

You see, relationships are a big part of our formative years and life is very much defined by it.. I'm not talking only in terms of romantic relationships but platonic and familial as well. So many people have been damaged by wrong relationships and inversely, so many people have been rescued and nurtured by the right relationships and associations. My prayer for you is that you would realise what the right kind for you is and embrace it, in order to be that which God has made you and called you to be.

I would continue in the next post and start from the beginning :-)
For now, I hope you know that the best relationship is the one with the One.. Jesus makes it all worth it and only Him can complete anyone.... I leave you with this beautiful song and wish you a most beautiful weekend.

God bless you xx

Friday, 4 December 2009

Conversations

My darling daddy,
How are you? My love, my joy, my peace, the glory and the lifter of my head..
I am just so thankful to you for all of the ways that you have shown me grace and favour.
It's good to have a father like you. I know I can talk to you about anything and everything and you will understand like no one else would.
Daddy I'm a bit confused, please make things clear and please give me the strength to make the right decision. I want to just hide in the shadow of your wings.
Everyday I am reminded of your profound love for me. I know that you hold me in such high esteem, I know that I am so precious to you. Perhaps if only we all knew just how precious we were to you!
But sometimes we forget daddy, and sometimes like the prodigal son it takes eating with swine to wake up and realise that in your palace, we are kings and queens.

Thank you for everything daddy.

Love you always,
One

Friday, 2 October 2009

Ladies!

..So I was thinking to myself, "when I get back to blogville, what would I like the theme of my blog to be" cause I don't want to write pointlessly, that would surely be a waste of my time. I have always wanted to be an inspiration, especially to young ladies (I don't know why) but I've always had a heart for young ladies like myself, and sort of considered it my "ministry".

My desire is to see more young ladies step out for God, ladies who would value themselves and have a solid cast-iron self-esteem that no one would be able to rubbish. One area that I know is very peculiar to many young ladies is the big "R" word; RELATIONSHIPS. Hence the reason why this blog dwells heavily (and more) on it. My desire is to see young ladies in more fulfilling relationships, to be treated with love and respect and handled delicately by whomever they have entrusted their hearts to.

My passion is ladies! I'm not a feminist, not at all. Neither am I a male-basher. But I recognise the special qualities that God has blessed women with. You better believe it, God loves women (specially)!

I hope to talk about a wide range of issues that are important to young ladies, using personal experiences sometimes to buttress a topic and generally facilitate a forum that women would feel free to express themselves, learn from one another and be inspired.

May God help me! xx

For those in a relationship/married (or not), I dedicate this song to you!

Monday, 28 September 2009

Thursday, 2 July 2009

10 Secrets to a happy Marriage/Relationship

Hiya I'm Backkkkk!!! lol... I really need to be cautioned by the "Blog Police"...
I have just been too lazy/busy/occupied to blog in the past few days + personal drama (s).. But hopefully this time I am back-ish.. I remember my note that stated that I would blog so much, Naija bloggers award would have no choice but to give (dash) me all the awards available... Now I guess the only award I would be eligible for would be... "Oh please get off blogger and get a life" award.. I can imagine my total joy (surprise/shock/pain/betrayal and everything in-between) that I would be feeling lol.. I would have to think of a good speech for that one.. That should keep me sufficiently busy for the next few days (hehe, I already have a good excuse if I don't blog soon-ish)
Anyways, how have you good people of blogville been? I have missed you all, from the witty to the inspirational to the feminists, to the good-natured rants to the tales of motherhood to the gossips (information) .. I haven't even had enough time to go blog-trotting, it is well, I shall repent of my deviant ways and reform my character :-)

So I have been reading a LOT lately and I just have to recommend these authors - Francine Rivers (I think I may have mentioned her before but just in case...) and Karen Kingsbury.. These women are just phenomenal! Trust me on this one, you would not be the same after reading their books... they weave real issues such as relationships etc etc into such wonderful fiction, you wouldn't be able to put the book down.. what's more, they do it from a christian point of view that sorts of put the icing on your cake :-). Don't be deceived, it's christian but there's nothing religious or methodic (is that a word?? well we must start using it someday right?:-)

For those who are particularly interested in relationships (as I am) I got this lovely secrets from Karen Kingsbury's book.. It's "10 Secrets to a happy marriage" but I have decided to add "to a successful relationship" as well for it helps whether you are in marriage or in a romantic/platonic relationship.. It was so brilliant I just had to share with you beautiful people..

....And if like me you want to write it up boldly and stick it up your bedroom wall, where you can wake up to reading it each day and see it before you retire for the night so you can even dream about it then please by all means do so!
More importantly, please make an effort to actually practice it and not just read it, at first it may be difficult but I'm sure in the end it would be well worth it!!

1. God has you here to serve one another. Love acted out is serving.

2. Women need respect and nurturing. Love your wife so she knows you'd lay your life down for her. Share a hobby - find something you can do to have fun together. Continue to date her and admire her.

3. Laugh often.

4. Be patient. Love crumbles under the weight of unmet expectations.

5. Spend more time trying to fix yourself than your spouse.

6. Keep short accounts. The bible says "Do not let the sun go down while you are angry. Make it a habit to forgive.

7. Determine upfront that divorce is not an option.

8. Learn about love languages. Not all people show love or receive it the same way. You want a back rub and your spouse wants a clean kitchen. The love languages are fairly simple: Acts of Service, Quality time, Physical Touch, Gifts and Words of Affirmation.. Learn them. Love is better received when it is in the language that person speaks.

9. Words of affirmation are a love language for ALL men.

10. Men are born to be leaders. He cannot lead unless she gives him the confidence to do so. If you love your husband, build him up. Confident men do not seek love outside the home.

PS I was actually trying to see which one of them was my favourite and to be honest I couldn't quite decide, they are all soo true!

PPS I think EVERYONE should read the book "THE 5 LOVE LANGUAGES" by Gary Chapman. Simply put, you will be amazed and the way you relate with people would change :-) (and no Gary Chapman did not pay me for the advert lol)

PPPS I listened to Verastic's blog radio for the first time this afternoon and I just want to say Congratulations girl, you're definitely a star!

Saturday, 20 June 2009

My Dear Daddy 2

My dear daddy,

How are you my first love? I missed writing to you last week and I'm sorry. I was soo tired out from all that happened that day, I really wanted to write to you but I was really exhausted. I know that you understand 'cause all through the day I could feel you so close through the immense success of the day. I smile with joy and I'm so proud that I have such a great father, daddy you make me GLAD!

My strength, my joy, my peace, the one that completes me, I want to thank you for the past week (well 2 weeks as it were, as I did not get the opportunity to say so last week). I don't really know what to say or rather where to start from....

I will just say one specific thing that made me think during the past week.. I thank you for Mr E's birthday last week. Remember how it used to be with him early last year, I asked and begged you for strength to get over him and still be able to live through it :-) He is a good man but wasn't the good man for me. As I wished him happy birthday, I smiled as I realised that I can talk to him now with my emotions intact and not all over the place :-) Thank you for allowing us to still be friends and more so for all the lessons that that period taught me!

Thank you for giving me back my self-esteem and self-worth, thank you for teaching me how to love and appreciate myself. Thank you for allowing me to make mistakes that I boasted "was beyond me" but then realised that anyone can be gullible by their own strength but you give grace to do all things.

Thank you that you made it easy for me to forgive and forget the past including myself, so I did not wallow in self pity and self condemnation but rather used the experience to be in a better position to love, understand and talk to people who are going trough similar situations.

Thank you for Mr E, he is my very good friend and I am glad I met him.

Thank you for wonderful and amazing friends! Oh daddy, the friends you have blessed me with are toooo much, please bless them extra special this week... thank you :-)

Tomorrow is father's day and even as the world celebrates fathers all over, I would like to say an early HAPPY FATHER'S DAY to the best daddy in the whole wide universe.

I love you always daddy.

Me,
Oneplustheone
xxxx

PS Daddy can you please let Pink -Satin experience the joy of going to church as much as I do? She said she wishes she gets excited about it like I do. Please daddy, let her see that side of you so that she can also LOVEEE going to church like me and David (who said he was glad when they said unto him, "let us go into the house of the Lord). Thank you daddy :-)

Friday, 12 June 2009

Family Post: MUM 101


When I grow up, I want to be like my mum...

Yes, I want to be like one of the greatest women I know...

I want to love God as much as she does.. Honestly, she is a role model for honour and respect to her daddy.

I want to be full of love and loyalty like her... Growing up with my mum was such a delight, she made us (me and my siblings) aware that she loved us VERY much. Even though there were times when I could have sworn that she must have adopted me especially when she disciplined us silly (trust me, my mother did not understand how to spare the rod) yet, she would draw us close just afterwards and explain why she "had" to do what she did.

I want to be fuelled by passion for my dreams and aspirations like her...I know passion is embedded in the DNA of women, nevertheless permit me to say that my mum's is worthy of mention. When she believes in something she would not hesitate or be shy to go after it. My mum is a fierce activist, not afraid to STAND for what she believes in..

I want to be as intelligent, hardworking and clever as her.... She comes top of her class (whether in school, church or playground lol). I remember once going to her office and one of her bosses was like "you should be proud of her, she is so clever" and I beamed in my little heart, with my little self thinking "WOW, go mum!" :-)

I want to be as creative as she is.. She made growing up sooooo much fun, my goodness "Oh why don't we do it a bit differently this time" "If you do all your chores in time, we would go for lunch at xyz"

I want to be as beautiful as she is... Beautiful nice skin, nice legs, nice smile, great dress sense.. I hope I look like (better lol) you at your age. People say to me "Oh she looks more like your sister" (I smile in Spanish)

.....I am not writing this to flatter or boast or... rather I know that family values are being lost again and again in today's world so my quota to today's world (lol) is to make Friday "Family Post".. I hope to extol the virtues of members of the (my) family and take out time to "count" their worth in order to appreciate them even though sometimes they make us want to pull our hair out hehe (I'm sure you understand...)

I'm sure if you think of it, your post would be (ok, maybe not :-) longer than mine....

God bless xx

He'll do it again!

Hey,

Sometimes, you feel so down and so low, you just need an uplifting...

Sometimes everything seems to be falling apart all at once and you just wish someone would come and rescue you from it all..

Sometimes all hope seems to have gone, nowhere to turn, no one really seems to understand..

Sometimes it seems like the troubles don't want to go away and there really isn't any help in sight....

Sometimes you have prayed and praised and done all the "good" things, yet nothing seems to be happening...

Sometimes even your loved ones are no where to be found and even the one you hold dearest can't be there for you...

Sometimes you wish the smiles that others see are really true and not the deep cry that goes on inside...

Sometimes you just want to give it all up...

....I heard this song again recently and for some reason it spoke to me so so deeply...


"Just take a look at where you've been and where you are now.."
"Hasn't He always come through for you
"He'll do it again....."

I pray that for you, you will laugh again, you will dance again, you will have hope again, you will believe in yourself again, you will dust yourself up and try again.....

Honey, things will work out again; you definitely may not know how and you may not even know when but be assured He WILL do it again!

God bless xx

Saturday, 6 June 2009

My Dear Daddy

Dear Daddy,

I love you and I want you to know that I do. I know you can see that I love you but I wish I could express it better. How are you today? I know that sometimes I get caught up in my own state that I forget to enquire about you. Sometimes, it's even because I don't think you need me to ask for I know that you are always good. Nevertheless, today I want to take the opportunity to ask "Daddy hope you are alright and the throne is comfortable".

You have taught me that the best way to start conversations with you is to exalt your name and person with words of praise and adoration. So, this is for you my King, my Love, the owner of heaven and earth, the ancient of days, always constant and never changing, the one to whom all power in heaven and on earth belongs to, my healer, my provider, my dearest and best friend, my faithful father. I take immense pleasure in adoring you.

Daddy, I have noticed that my fellow blogging brothers and sisters have decided to take out a day of the week to say "thank you".. they call it different titles "Thankful Mondays", "Thankful Posts" "I Give Thanks Today". Whenever I read these posts, I am reminded of your goodness to us all and although I may not have listed them in the past, I definitely appreciate every one of them and say a big "THANK YOU". You know I can be a "copy-cat" especially when it comes to doing things for you, so I have made up my mind that I shall copy these thankful posts too.. I know that a thankful heart always receives more, so I would not allow my "more" to pass me by. Besides dad, I do it because I love you and I want to make you smile.

I will do mine a bit differently though, I will write you a weekly letter to gist with you in addition to saying thank you (you know I love your attention :-) and here's my first one. I really hope I would be able to keep up to date with them, you know me and my procrastination, I need your help in that area (pretty please with Jesus on it :-)

Thank you for the lovely weather that we have had in the past week, oh it was soo lovely and soo hot, I actually longed for a bit of cold! Alas the cold came just when I shaved my legs ready for my shorts. I guess maybe you didn't want me exposing too much leg lol (but I promise it wasn't too short and I was going to the beach too). Can you please make the sun come back before the hair grows back? Thank you :-)

Then how can I forget what happened on Thursday.. I remember waking up thinking "let this pass over too" but then I remembered the chorus of the song I heard just the day before "you may not know how, you may not know when but He would do it again" and then I became encouraged and everything seemed like it was going to be alright in the end and yes it was (I smile at thought), thank you soo much, you are too much!

Wow, Daddy I have only mentioned 2 things and I have written so long! Let me just say this, I thank you for Monday (the honour bestowed), Tuesday, Wednesday (the lady that came and the meeting), Thursday (making something out of nothing), Friday(oh, Friday was too much! I was, and still am overwhelmed), for today (even in the rain... wow) and tomorrow (with you, I know it's going to be alright!)

I can't wait to be in church tomorrow, just like David... "I was glad when they said unto me, let us go into the house of the Lord" and it's thanksgiving Sunday too, yipeeee!!!! (praises, dance and food hehe)...

I love you dad, you mean the world to mean...

Me,
Oneplustheone xxxx

Tuesday, 26 May 2009

Memoirs of an ageing Young-y


I have blogged so many times in my head... If only there was ever such a thing as "mental" blogging... fantastica! As I go about my day I see or notice something that I think "Oh I definately need to blog about that" Infact, I already start with the intro and all but sadly that's where it all ends...

Unfortunately this is true about some ideas/dreams that we have - They start and end in our minds.. ...
If only we could buy and sell/trade/engage in business/write novels/talk to that person/say I'm sorry/say I Love you, in and through our minds.. How wonderful would that be!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My body feels as though it has been dragged through a grinding mill, why? well beacuse I jumped and threw my hands in the air -a la concert style- for all of about 30mins yesterday... I was saying to my friends, "Oh my, I think I'm getting old! (or maybe just plain unfit)" In the past, I was usually called to be at the fore-front of such craziness and I gleefully led such (excruciating) aerobics display but this time 'round, a younger (and more fit/lithe/slim) individual was asked to lead the jumping and flaying of hands!

I didn't feel bad/neglected about it but it made me realise a few home-truths:

1. There's always going to be a younger person
2. I would not be young forever
3. Enjoy your glory days for no matter how much you think they would last forever something always happens - AGE, that's what! (Ask Elizabeth Taylor {sadly, I even had to google her to remember her last name})
4. Achieve as much as you can today, tomorrow do even more and next week, break all past personal records.

This is not to scare, frighten or make you hate growing up, rather I hope it makes you appreciate today more, the drive, energy and strength you have at each stage of your life.. for it's there for a purpose - to be used in the measure it's been given. As a youngster remember to dance hard, play hard, laugh hard, work hard, pray hard, serve God hard, pursue and work towards your dream hard... In doing that, you lay for yourself a foundation to ensure that there wouldn't be room for regrets and "what ifs" later in life... Enjoy every moment and stage as it ought to be..

So that when you are 60 and you see a teenager dancing like there's no tomorrow, you would only smile and say.. "allow him/her it's their time, I remember when I was his/her age.." without any bitterness or grudge...

So that when you are 75, you can proudly look back on your achievements and fruits of your hard work.

So that when you are 90 you can be celebrated by the world and the youngsters strive to display their energy before you (Ask Nelson Mandela {I didn't have to google him :-)

God bless xx

Sunday, 24 May 2009

Daddy's Angry Again

Daddy's angry again.
He's shouting and screaming
Using bad words
I didn't do anything
No, nothing major
I only asked for money for fees
He hates when I come with these requests
They seem to get to him so
Not that he doesn't love me
No, no he does
So very much
Then why is he so upset at me?
I didn't impose the fees
If I had my way there wouldn't be any
Maybe I should keep quiet
But then I would be kicked out of school
Then he would be MADDDD
Maybe I should wait longer
But then it would leave him less time to source for the money
He would still be MADD
.......
Why did we become poor?
Daddy is a good man
Hardworking and honest
Loyal and faithful
Loves and obeys God
Why did things become so tough
Why is he angry at the mention of money?
When would we be rich again?
When would money not be a problem?
Why is the world so unfair?

But like Psalm 126 v 5-6
I will wait
I have to wait
I can only wait

(For all those in the "waiting" period - whatever it may be, marriage, money, child, success, school, health - God will surely come through for you, He hasn't forgotten you. Although it seems as if the wait would never end.. remember "even if your father and your mother forsake you He would not leave you" (Psalm 91v10) Hold on, hold on, hold on.... Don't be discouraged He loves you more than you know. After crying all night, your joy would come in the morning...

If nothing else, remember: God loves you sooooo much!

Wednesday, 13 May 2009

Something (NOT) for the Examination Hall


Hiya!


Well, since I am not quite able to put up a post, I thought I might as well leave for you good people of blogville something to laugh about. In honour of the fact that a lot of people are in the middle of exams/assessments/courseworks, here are some recommendations for "What to do in an exam hall if you don't know any answer to the questions asked" culled from this facebook group




Disclaimer* Please do not try this at home... If you do, you will have only yourself to blame! lol


ENJOY!


1. Get a copy of the exam, run out screaming "Andre, Andre, I've got the secret documents!!"


2. Talk the entire way through the exam. Read questions aloud, debate your answers with yourself out loud. If asked to stop, yell out, "I'm SOOO sure that you can hear me thinking." Then start talking about what a jerk the instructor is.


3. Bring a Game Boy. Play with the volume at max level.


4. On the answer sheet find a new, interesting way to refuse to answer every question. For example: I refuse to answer this question on the grounds that it conflicts with my religious beliefs. Be creative.


5. Run into the exam room looking about frantically. Breathe a sigh of relief. Go to the instructor, say "They've found me, I have to leave the country" and run off.


6. 15 min. into the exam, stand up, rip up all the papers into very small pieces, throw them into the air and yell out "Merry Christmas." If you're really daring, ask for another copy of the exam. Say you lost the first one. Repeat this process every 15 min.


7. Come into the exam wearing slippers, a bathrobe, a towel on your head, and nothing else.


8. Be as vulgar as possible during the exam, make sure every sentence has every other word as a swear word or some sexual innuendo for example.


9. Bring things to throw at the instructor when s/he's not looking. Blame it on the person nearest to you.


10. As soon as the instructor hands you the exam, eat it.


11. Every 5 min. stand up, collect all your things, move to another seat, continue with the exam.


12. Turn in the exam approx. 30 min. into it. As you walk out, start commenting on how easy it was.


13. Get the exam. 20 min into it, throw your papers down violently, scream out "Fuck this!" and walk out triumphantly.


14. Arrange a protest before the exam starts (ie. Threaten the instructor that whether or not everyone's done, they are all leaving after one hour to go drink.)


15. Show up completely drunk (completely drunk means at some point during the exam, you should start crying for mommy).


16. Comment on how sexy the instructor is looking that day.


17. Come to the exam wearing a black cloak. After about 30 min, put on a white mask and start yelling "I'm here, the phantom of the opera" until they drag you away.


18. If the exam is math/sciences related, make up the longest proofs you could possible think of. Get pi and imaginary numbers into most equations. If it is a written exam, relate everything to your own life story.


19. Try to get people in the room to do a wave.


20. Bring some large, cumbersome, ugly idol. Put it right next to you. Pray to it often. Consider a small sacrifice.


21. During the exam, take apart everything around you. Desks, chairs, anything you can reach.


22. Puke into your exam booklet. Hand it in. Leave.


23. Take 6 packages of rice cakes to the exam. Stuff at least 2 rice cakes into your mouth at once. Chew, then cough. Repeat if necessary.


24. Walk in, get the exam, sit down. About 5 min into it, loudly say to the instructor, "I don't understand ANY of this. I've been to every lecture all semester long! What's the deal? And who the hell are you? Where's the regular guy?"


25. Do the entire exam in another language. If you don't know one, make one up!


26. Bring a black marker. Return the exam with all questions and answers completely blacked out.


27. Every now and then, clap twice rapidly. If the instructor asks why, tell him/her in a very derogatory tone, "the light bulb that goes on above my head when I get an idea is hooked up to a clapper. DUH!"


28. From the moment the exam begins, hum the theme to Jeopardy. Ignore the instructor's requests for you to stop. When they finally get you to leave one way or another, begin whistling the theme to the Bridge on the River Kwai.


29. After you get the exam, call the instructor over, point to any question, ask for the answer. Try to work it out of him/her.


30. Bring cheat sheets FOR ANOTHER CLASS (make sure this is obvious... like history notes for a calculus exam... otherwise you're not just failing, you're getting kicked out too) and staple them to the exam, with the comment "Please use the attached notes for references as you see fit."


31. Fake an orgasm. When interrupted, apologize, and explain that question #__ moved you, deeply


32. Wear a superman outfit under your normal clothes. 30 minutes into the exam, jump up and answer your phone, shouting "What? I'm on my way!!". rip off your outer clothes and run out of the room. strike a pose first for added effect.


33. Upon receiving the exam, look it over, while laughing loudly, say "you don't really expect me to waste my time on this drivel? Days of our Lives is on!!!"


34. Get deliveries of candy, flowers, balloons, telegrams, etc. . . sent to you every few minutes throughout the exam.


35. In the middle of the exam stand up and yell 'they’re coming for me!' and run out.


......And my advice?? If you don't know any of the answers to the questions, please bend your head low and pray like your life depended on it.. (Well that may actually well be the case hehe)


God bless xx

Friday, 8 May 2009

Allow me to Introduce (2).....







In the spirit of introducing and also supporting the wonderful bloggers that are BSNC and Miss FlyHigh, here's the hottest thing to hit blogville *drum-roll please*


It's a new blog recently launched by a trio of beautiful and articualate ladies MissFlyHigh, Brown Skin Naija Chic aka BSNC and Bibi..

It's only just started and has an audio welcome/introduction post but judging from the team's individual blogs, you are in for a treat!


Check it out/include in your blogroll and "firsssssst" it as much as possible lol

Good job ladies!


God bless xx

Thursday, 7 May 2009

Allow Me To Introduce......

Hiya!!

I was just going through some of my group pages on facebook (yeah I do that :-) when I saw a link that led me to, and introduced me to this lovely lovely Nigerian singer... I can't believe I am just hearing about her and hearing the song.. I'm sure many people have already heard the song but it's new to me and I am sooo loving it..

Allow me to introduce (or re-introduce as the case may be) this beautiful, immensely talented, lively, spirited young lady, from the blessed country that is Nigeria in the coast of West Africa...*drum-roll please* JAHDIEL!

Like I said, I don't really know a lot about her, only what I see from her music videos (lame, I know) but she has such a likeable personality :-)... I would definitely look out for her and bring you more info if I get any.. (I know, I know and you are welcome :-)

I have only been opportuned to listen to 2 of this songstress/minister's songs and they are Heritage and Eloheeka. The former is my favourite of the two but I assure you that they are both worth a listen.... As usual, when I "discover" a new song, it goes on repeat on my laptop....((I play and play until I wear myself out with it, hehe)

Her voice is sonorous and the rhythm infectious... very easy to love.. If you liked "wellu wellu" from Sammie Okposo or "Woekilemo" by Asu Ekiye you would fall in love with Heritage. If your taste is more upbeat/soft rock a la RoofTop MCs then Eloheeka would be your thing.

I will try to upload the video (I need lessons!) but if not, listen to Heritage HERE and Eloheeka http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HBy_rTJ5ac0






p.s Oh wow... My very first blog miracle!! I learnt how to put a video up and it's really as easy as ABC (Ignorance truly is a disease...:-)

God bless xx

Monday, 4 May 2009

DILEMMA


Oh I have been so bad at updating this blog....
Whatever happened to my resolution??
I refuse to slack.. no way! :-)
I haven't neglected my blog rounds though, blogs can be oh so addictive...

What would you do if your sister's husband started making advances at you??
My friend was in this kind of situation and she was soo upset about it (putting it mildly). As with many African families, it's not new for one to house his/her sibling, my friend (let's call her Suzy) was leaving with her sister, sister's husband and kids. Everything was peachy and everyone got along so well - she and the sis' hussy were quite close in the older brother/sister kinda way, she and sis had a loving relationship and she loved the kids like her own.

Unfortunately, recently hussy starts to act up and "mistakenly" brush past her in the corridor, make references to her "endowments" and how lucky her husband would be and blah.. The thing is she didn't know how to tell her sis cause she knew it would totally crush her and may affect her marriage (bear in mind, that hussy treated her sis really well and they seemed to have something good going on, they were both Christians as well). She couldn't tell their parents either cause she knew it would spoil the good relationship they had as in-laws, she couldn't speak to people cause she was just embarrassed about the whole thing!

Eventually she had to speak about it to her sis who of course didn't take it so well and refused to believe it, she confided in her mum who was naturally upset at the whole thing but begged her to keep from letting their father know as he would go ballistic.
Sis confronts hussy, he vehemently denies it and Suzy feels even worse and like a home-wrecker but then she had to say it as it was getting out of hand and she respected both sis and hussy too much to keep quiet about it....

Thinking about it, what would I do in that position (God forbid) but truly it could happen to anyone, be it brother-in-law, uncle-in-law, step father, friend's husband etc.. What would make it difficult would be if you all had a good rapport and things had to change as a result... Why do men go after such close relatives even if they want to stray?

My thoughts are that sometimes, it's not about the guys being promiscuous, it's more about the opportunity presenting itself (don't get me wrong, I don't for one moment excuse the men as they are at fault) but, imagine a young (beautiful) woman in the house, who cooks your meals, takes care of your children and home, is there to listen to you without the judging looks/tones of your wife, who respects you.... all the things your wife does, only thing is she's not sharing your bed... Attraction would certainly build and proximity breeds "unholy" fondness..

It's good to be a custodian to relatives and so on, furthermore, it's good to have them around to help/keep company... but hmm sometimes it's hard for guys not to get drawn to ladies they see/smell/breathe on a daily basis...
Please guys hold yourselves, not everything desirable is a must have, communicate openly with your other half, control your desires and like the bible says, "let every man possess his vessel" not the vessel possessing the man....

God bless xxxx

Friday, 24 April 2009

Pass You By - A Boyz II Men Lesson


So I was doing my blog- round with some Boyz II Men playing softly in the background.. I was reading all the comments for my last post (thanks for your comments guys!) Yeah so, this song by BoyZ II Men came up and when I heard the chorus I was like wow so true.. Recently I have been reading/hearing how ladies go through this "wrong love" syndrome.. It's as old as old itself and the funny thing is one would have thought that by now we all will be wiser...I'm sure guys also go through this albeit very rarely..

So why do ladies "stick it out" with a guy that maltreats them? There are many "good" reasons that have been given for staying in such a relationship..."Oh I love him so much", "it's really not that bad, it's only when I upset him or when he is angry/drunk/depressed", "he loves me a lot that's why he acts like that when he gets jealous", "I'm the one that he really loves, the other girls are the ones who keep running after him", "it's normal in all relationships, every one has up and down moments"......too many reasons/excuses, yet all not valid for staying with someone who would end up killing you deep inside...
So here are excerpts from the song, it's self-explanatory really,

"Don't have to stay with someone

That makes you cry

You'll end up killing all the love you have inside

Can't hope to see the sun

If you don't open your eyes

Girl don't let real love pass you by"


If he makes you cry, if he makes you sad, if he makes you lose your self esteem, leave, don't stay with him... If he makes you an emotional yoyo- high one second and so low the next- he is slowly killing the essence of you.. No one should ever be allowed to do that to you. Sad thing is if you stay with him, you will miss out on the opportunity to open your eyes and your heart to another person worthy of your love.

It's funny how we think "its him or no other", trust me, you would never find out the truth if you continue to stay with him...remember just as the saying goes .." a child thinks his father's farm is the biggest and the best until he goes out and sees the neighbours".. You can definately do better..

The beginning of the song talks about how amazing the girl was

"She was like nothing I'd ever known

Her eyes shine like diamonds, in a field of snow"...

YOU ARE A STAR, PRICELESS, BEAUTIFULLY AND WONDERFULLY CREATED.. You need to be with someone who not only knows and says it but makes you feel that way..You need a man who would celebrate you just as you do to him. Don't settle for any less...

"You can see the glow slowly fading from her eyes

Though she denies her pain and her dismay"

A good man makes you feel like you can "touch the sky" just as Celine Dion sang but the wrong one takes away the sparkle from your eyes, you become a shadow of yourself.. if he does that to you, please don't stay. there's potential in you that the right sort of loving releases, don't deny your destiny the opportunity to manifest.. don't deny yourself the experience of true joy and fulfillment..

Rememember, you deserve a good man, it's not only a select few that are destined to be loved, EVERYONE is entitled to it, don't let him cheat you out of it, more importantly, don't cheat yourself.. It's a decision you have to make. It may seem hard or even impossible but do yourself a favour... If you don't take off the rag, you would not be able to wear the princely robe, if you don't let it go, the good man waiting round the corner would pass you by...

God wants only the best for you...let it go and let Him show you what real love is
xx

Here's the song....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2aDCfWdEQ28

Wednesday, 22 April 2009

Case of the Ex


I just finished chatting with the ex.... He was the one I could say I was actually "crazy" about... There was just this connection that was special...He was the one guy that I was just soo attracted to.. Not because he was drop dead gorgeous (brother is good-looking though) but that wasn't the main thing, that's when I realised how the deeper you felt for a guy influenced how physically attracted you were to him...

So we were chatting on messenger today and catching up, laughing and stuff (even the littlest things are funny when we talk) I guess there's just this compatibility factor...

Yeah, so today I finally told him about the fact that I was seeing someone. I wasn't hiding it but we havent spoken in a while.. It was a bit...... I don't know..

I love my boyfriend but sometimes especially at this early stage, I get doubts sometimes (yeah, I was going to ask about that, is that normal at the beginning of relationships? Is it normal to ask questions like "have I made the right decision? Definately definately surely sure?) Like I mentioned in my earlier post here, though I sometimes have doubts, sometimes I am soo sure... So I was wondering if that was normal.. hmmm

But as me and the ex were talking, I started to reminisce on the old days and in truth I miss him, but I love my boyfriend....I loveD the ex but I love by boyfriend...

So I asked myself the question I have always pondered on, when you fall in love, what happens when things don't work out, was it that it wasn't really love in the first place? Do you stop loving the person? Can you stop loving someone? Is it possible to stop loving someone? If it is, what do you now feel for the person if you don't hate them? Would the person forever have a special place? If yes, then doesn't that put a strain on your current relationship?

I wonder, I just wonder (For those who watched "Third-Eye :-)

So any takers??
xx

Monday, 20 April 2009

Daddy's Angry Again

Daddy's angry again.
He's shouting and screaming
Using bad words
I didn't do anything
No, nothing major
I only asked for money for fees
He hates when I come with these requests
They seem to get to him so
Not that he doesn't love me
No, no he does
So very much
Then why is he so upset at me?
I didn't impose the fees
If I had my way there wouldn't be any
Maybe I should keep quiet
But then I would be kicked out of school
Then he would be MADDDD
Maybe I should wait longer
But then it would leave him less time to source for the money
He would still be MADD
.......
Why did we become poor?
Daddy is a good man
Hardworking and honest
Loyal and faithful
Loves and obeys God
Why did things become so tough
Why is he angry at the mention of money?
When would we be rich again?
When would money not be a problem?
Why is the world so unfair?

But like Psalm 126 v 5-6
I will wait
I have to wait
I can only wait

(For all those in the "waiting" period - whatever it may be, marriage, money, child, success, school, health - God will surely come through for you, He hasn't forgotten you. Although it seems as if the wait would never end.. remember "even if your father and your mother forsake you He would not leave you" (Psalm 91v10) Hold on, hold on, hold on.... Don't be discouraged He loves you more than you know. After crying all night, your joy would come in the morning...

If nothing else, remember: God loves you sooooo much!

Baby, Why haven't you called?
























Oh I can't wait to finish this project so I can get my life back!! lol

I want to bloggggggggggg! I actually now prefer it to facebook *gasp, shock horror* lol. But blogville + citizens are too much, wonderful people......And one would never guess how addictive it is, like the pringles advert, "once you pop, you can't stop" erhmm more like "once you start you just keep going, from one link to another and another 'nother....."

So yeah last week I was walking back home from the library with two guys and they were having this conversation (without me), I didn't know them but we were walking together - long story)....Anyways the conversation went something like this:

Guy 1: All she wants to do is talk on the phone all the time. I told her at the beginning that I am not a phone kinda guy and she was like ok but now its call this, call that!
Guy 2: Oh yours is better, mine just wants to text all day, I'm like 'what the...'

I couldnt really contribute to the convo as I was not invited (lol) but I was just smiling to myself like "so it's a general phenomenon"....Funny thing was that me and my friends were just talking about how we wished our boyfriends would call more and more importantly do it without us prompting them to, why they don't like talking on the phone etc etc...

Usually my convo with the bfriend is *phone rings*, I see his name, I get excited and then...

Me: It's not fair, you don't love me anymore, since morning I havent spoken to you!
Him: But I spoke to you this morning!
Me: That wasn't a conversation, it was only for 5mins...
Him: *Confused silence*

But really, why don't guys understand the importance of being on the phone for ages? I know ladies talk a lot (As for me, I can be given a Nobel prize for my outstanding contribution to the art of talking...lol). Thing is he understands and indulges me most times (bless him) but then sometimes it's not convenient for him esp late at night after a long day and he's like "darling, I am tired" and I am like but "love is sacrifice" :-)

I have a feeling that I am not the only chic that thinks this way (or am I?? That would be a scary thought) But I know countless times when my friends (who by the way, have spoken to the bf recently) would pick up their ringing phones and be like (ever so softly) "Babyyy, why haven't you called me since?"

PS Do guys get irritated by this?
PPS I havent spoken to the boyfriend today sooo he's kinda in for the question (he called when I was asleep this morning so that doesn't count right? :-)

God bless
xx

Friday, 17 April 2009

Because I'm worth it!


Just checking in.....

I only started reading blogs properly late last year, thinking before then that it was a huge waste of time (lol, now i gladly eat my words!). I got introduced (addicted) to blogville through Linda Ikeji (Love her blog, really down to earth). It was recommended to me by my mum who is such a big fan.. The surprising thing is that usually my mum is not so into social networks, blogs etc, I'm sure the only function the internet served her was to check her e-mail like once in a yellow moon. Therefore her loving Linda Ikeji's blog was a big(s) deal lol.

Not until I started following her write-ups did I come to appreciate blogging, infact I must admit that Linda inspired me to starting my own blog!! I love the way she is soo open and honest about her views and opinions not minding if everyone concurs or not. Before I started reading her blog, I hadn't heard a lot about her, although I have come to realise that she's one of Nigeria's top models and young female entrepreneurs.... Nigeria's own Tyra Banks! You go girl!!!

Back to life and living, it's so easy to forget to stop and appreciate life. We are all busy with living and trying to survive in this crazy crazy world!! The sad thing is after everything, we would still die, that's a harsh certainty... The only thing that makes all our struggling worthwhile is what we choose to do with our life whilst alive....

There's a saying which goes "when life gives you lemons, make lemonades". I know it's easier said than done but in order to achieve a fulfilling life, one has to work towards it. Appreciate the important things in life, learn to say "I love you" even if sometimes they don't say it back, saying it makes you feel good! Learn to express yourself..even if people don't like it, that's who you are and changing that would only make them happy and you miserable. One important thing to always remember is that you feel most comfortable in your own skin, be yourself at all times!!!

Learn to take corrections and accept criticism in good faith. RESPECT yourself. Don't allow anyone take you for granted, you are special and unique. It's not just a saying, it's actually true. The way you comport youself determines the way people treat you. When you believe something or believe in something, it reflects in your actions. Act like you believe in yourself, act like you believe that you are one of a kind! Improve your self-esteem, feel good about yourself.

Don't forget to treat others the way you want to be treated, remember what goes around comes around and you only reap what you sow.

Trust in God, He's the only one that makes it all worth it... He thinks the world of you, when you imagine that someone sooo great, who could have a pick of who to love, chose you to just love......haaa, that's a huge ego-booster. He doesn't joke with you so why should mere man? Because of Him you are soo special!! Hold that thought, don't let what "he said" or "she said" discourage you, You are worth it!!

xx

Thursday, 16 April 2009

Random Thoughts

I am soo buoyed over with work, aaargghhh!
Someone PLEASE get me out here!
I miss my boyfriend, wish I could see him right now!
I am not meant to be on blogsville until after the end of the day.
I am sorry I have to break that rule today.
I am tired of researching.
I want my stress-free, essay-free, research-free life back!
I want to sleep, wake-up, eat, sleep, wake-up, eat....(You get my drift)
Education is very tasking and mind-numbing.
Why do people go on and on about it!?
Did I forget to mention that I want to see my boooo?
My bad! Ok, I want to see him, I miss him :-)
I have a new toaster (make that 2)
It's funny how the dating scene is dry UNTIL you get off it then it starts raining men.
Life is full of irony(s) like that.
Ok enough rambling.
Back to work... (Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!)

(That felt good :-)
Hugs, kisses, God bless xx

Tuesday, 14 April 2009

Knock Knock..

Hiya blogville!!

See I love you sooo much that rather than studying I am sneaking to do a quick post :-)

Anyways, although I cannot write a full post at the moment I thought to share this lovely joke(s) with y'all...

Special shout out to Ms FlyHigh and Doll. I really and truly appreciate your comments, you guys ROCK!!

Ways girls turn (UN)romantic guys down

HE: I'm a photographer I've been looking for a face like
yours!
SHE: I'm a plastic surgeon .I've been looking for a face
like yours!!!

HE: Hi! Didn't we go on a date once? or was it twice?
SHE: Must've been once. I never make the same mistake
twice!!!

HE: May I have the pleasure of this dance?
SHE: No, I'd like to have some pleasure too!!!

HE: How did you get to be so beautiful?
SHE: I must've been given your share!!!

HE: Will you come out with me this Saturday?
SHE: Sorry! I'm having a headache this weekend!!!

HE: Your face must turn a few heads!
SHE: And your face must turn a few stomachs!!!

HE: Go on, don't be shy. Ask me out!
SHE: Okay, get out!!!

HE: I think I could make you very happy
SHE: Why? Are you leaving?

HE: What would you say if I asked u to marry me?
SHE: Nothing. I can't talk and laugh at the same time!!!

HE: Can I have your name?
SHE: Why, don't you already have one?

HE: Shall we go and see a film?
SHE: I've already seen it!!!

HE: Do you think it was fate which brought us together?
SHE: Nah, it was plain bad luck!!!

Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you.

Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.

Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.

Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?

Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Where I'll be the rest of your life - in your
wildest dreams

Monday, 13 April 2009

Random + Laying it Bare

Hiya!

- I am all tied up with my final project (Not finding it funny, can't wait for it to be ALL OVER!!)
- But I still have time for blog rounds and facebook :-) Maybe I should quit..the latter.
- I have discovered some new blog *treasures* (You guys are bad for my academic life... but I love you really, lol) - Ms FlyHigh, AnotherShot, Buttercup, Just...Toluwa


And yeah, I got this write-up (with permission) to share...It makes a lot of sense...enjoy!

WRITE THE VISION
‘Then the Lord answered me and said:
“Write the vision and make it plain on tablets, That he may run who reads it” Habakkuk 2v3 (NKJV)

It’s funny how we make extensive and comprehensive preparations for many things in our lives: choice schools we want to attend, career we want to pursue, houses we want to live in, our dream cars and so on but we often fail to plan properly for one of the most important stages in our lives: Marriage.

Most people know they want to get married one day, that’s part of the success in life but unfortunately for many the only detail they have of the institution is that they want; a good spouse, a very good marriage and very very good children.

It’s important to understand that marriage itself is ordained by God and only Him can sustain a good marriage, but it is also important as individuals to prepare and make plans for it. The person one chooses to spend the better part of his or her life with is very important and instrumental to having a successful relationship hence a big emphasis on choosing the right partner. We often wait for the ideal man or woman to come our way but the question is “Who is your ideal partner?” Would you be able to identify him/her if they came knocking on your door? I know many people would be quick to say a resounding yes but let’s hold on for one minute and think “How?”

It’s easy to assume that you would know when they come but unfortunately, reality is always not as easy as it seems. Let’s take for example buying your dream car. Would you say “I would know immediately I saw it that that’s the one”?. The guess is probably not. The reason being, first and foremost, before you have a “dream” car, you must have been thinking about it for a while. You must have made your judgement based on many criteria, how it fits your lifestyle, brand, colour, something you would be fully proud of, to mention a few. For those who are even more passionate, it doesn’t end there, you take a step further in investigating its potential, comparing its performance with other brands, life span, engine capacity, fuel gauge, year it was manufactured; basically the stuff it’s made of. You don’t walk into an automobile shop saying I want a good car and drive off with the first one that the dealer presents to you.

If one can plan so extensively for a car, then it is not too hard to come to the conclusion that one’s life partner should involve even more precision. If it helps, “write down the vision”.
Put in writing the qualities you want in a partner, including both the important – relationship with God, good hygiene, and the trivial- food preference, handling of the toothpaste.. Write it out in scale of preference, that is, from most important to least important. Your list may be unique to you because what is important to you may not be to another person but then remember it’s your relationship not any others’.

A lot of people are against having a “list” arguing that it makes one too choosy but then let’s analyse its importance. First of all, “What if you are particular about the person whom you choose to give yourself to as long as you both shall live?” You as an individual are priceless; God makes us to understand in His word that you are “fearfully and wonderfully made” and the “apple of His eyes”. You are so important and worthy, He sent His only son to die for you. Furthermore, even physically, your mother paid a high price of birth pain to bring you forth so why would you not settle for anything but the best? You are worth it!

Secondly I would rather regard it as being prepared rather than being choosy. Knowing what you want makes it easy to identify the person. If you know what you are looking for, you wouldn’t need to go through the rigours of “trial and error” before meeting them as you are armed with enough information. It also helps to prevent heart-ache and heart break as you don’t wait to be in an emotionally-involved relationship before finding out if he/she is ideal. Not every Tom, Dick or Harry would have access to your heart.

Finally it makes you more focused. You have a goal and a vision and you are “running with it”. You are able to pray consistently and specifically about the qualities you desire and you have even more clarity on what is important and what is not, what you can do without and what is essential.

It is important to note that for some people, “writing the vision” may become an obsessive task and if not done prayerfully and with wisdom may become just a fantasy. Remember that you are going to marry a human being; flesh and blood. Someone, who like you is not perfect, therefore make allowances for them to fall short sometimes. Nevertheless, ensure that they don’t fall short of those fundamental things you cannot live without for the rest of your life not just a short period. Also, be open to direction from God at all times, never go at it alone. If you are willing He is. He would bless you with only the best.

Go on…….Write the Vision!

Wednesday, 1 April 2009

The One??

Quick post..

- I am officially in a relationship!

- He makes me smile from within...

- Sometimes I am scared/have doubts about it

- Most times I am sooo sure about it

- I think about him and "us" like consistently!

- I have started to consciously pray for him (one time, before my mother, shame on me :-)

- I could talk to him for hours, hang up and then want to call him straight away

- I have some issues that even I didn't realise until recently :-)

- I could be a DRAMA queen!

- He understands and is very patient..

I look forward to this new journey/ride/experience with a lot of excitement/fear/joy/hmm../delight/anticipation/ignorance/faith/trust/love....

I'm grateful to God....
xxxx

Tuesday, 24 March 2009

Here Today....(May be) Gone Tomorrow


I know a lot of people have heard about the death of Reality TV star Jade Goody in the early hours of Sunday morning at the young age of 27...

It was sad hearing that this young lady had really gone.
I remember when I first heard that she was diagonised with the ugly scourge that is Cancer (Read about it here)I was like wow this lady's middle name is drama!
At the time, Jade Goody was fresh from a racial scandal in the Celebrity Big Brother House and was away in India trying to redeem her image .
One obvious thing about Jade's life was that everything seemed to happen so fast.... Infact if she were African, people would have said she probably knew she was going to live a such a short life hence her very "fast" life....

At the age of 19, she entered the Big Brother House and stood out (for being outrageously ignorant of general knowledge). Although she didn't win, she emerged the most popular housemate till date of the show.

Before we could spell JADE, she went on to be a huge success and in a blink of the eye as it were, Jade Goody became a household name: on our TV screens, on our bedside table (on her perfume bottle), on our reading table (her biography) and so on.... She was living the dream, a real grass to grace story.. Many times, she was accused of acting inappropriately, almost as if her upbringing and humble background conflicted with the level of sudden stardom and fame.....It was soo much in such a short time, perhaps she needed time adjusting...

But then again, it had to happen so fast because she wasn't going to be around for very long..... I am happy that Jade was able to achieve what many only dream about through their long lifetime. It seemed as if she was all up in our faces, but she needed to be because we wouldn't see her for too long..

I am a firm believer in that the quality of a man's life is not how long but how well...What's the point of living a 100 miserable years if you can have 40 excellent ones? We all pray for long life but we also pray for good lives.....

What's more important and what for me was the icing on her cake was that in the end she sought a relationship with God, she also went on to have her and her sons christened. It was a beautiful thing to hear...Everything would have been a waste if after all, she died without Jesus. She made the best decision ever and sealed not just her here but her after....A wise woman indeed.

So, her story has made me think, if I died now, what would be my story? Do I have a story? What am I doing to add quality to my life? Do I just live everyday as though it were fleeting? How can I improve myself?

These are questions you should ask yourself too, we may be here today but gone tomorrow..

May God help us!!
xxxx

Friday, 20 March 2009

What's your purpose?



Hiya!

I got this lovely article sent to my email and I thought it would inspire at least one person (hope it does)..... It's definately worth reading, DON'T BE DISCOURAGED BY IT'S LENGTH lol...
Trust me you would be a better person at the end of it, ENJOY!!

Here's a great interview with Rick Warren. He wrote the Purpose Driven Life, A highly recommended book.

You will enjoy the new insights that Rick Warren has, with his wife now having cancer and him having 'wealth' from the book sales. This is an absolutely incredible short interview with Rick Warren,

'Purpose Driven Life ' author and pastor of Saddleback Church in California
In the interview by Paul Bradshaw with Rick Warren, Rick said:

People ask me, What is the purpose of life?
And I respond: In a nutshell, life is preparation for eternity. We were not made to last forever, and God wants us to be with Him in Heaven.
One day my heart is going to stop, and that will be the end of my body-- but not the end of me.
I may live 60 to 100 years on earth, but I am going to spend trillions of years in eternity. This is the warm-up act - the dress rehearsal. God wants us to practice on earth what we will do forever in eternity.
We were made by God and for God, and until you figure that out, life isn't going to make sense.
Life is a series of problems: Either you are in one now, you're just coming out of one, or you're getting ready to go into another one.
The reason for this is that God is more interested in your character than your comfort; God is more interested in making your life holy than He is in making your life happy.
We can be reasonably happy here on earth, but that's not the goal of life. The goal is to grow in character, in Christ likeness.
This past year has been the greatest year of my life but also the toughest, with my wife, Kay, getting cancer.
I used to think that life was hills and valleys - you go through a dark time, then you go to the mountaintop, back and forth. I don't believe that anymore.
Rather than life being hills and valleys, I believe that it's kind of like two rails on a railroad track, and at all times you have something good and something bad in your life.
No matter how good things are in your life, there is always something bad that needs to be worked on.
And no matter how bad things are in your life, there is always something good you can thank God for..
You can focus on your purposes, or you can focus on your problems:
If you focus on your problems, you're going into self-centeredness, which is my problem, my issues, my pain.' But one of the easiest ways to get rid of pain is to get your focus off yourself and onto God and others.
We discovered quickly that in spite of the prayers of hundreds of thousands of people, God was not going to heal Kay or make it easy for her- It has been very difficult for her, and yet God has strengthened her character, given her a ministry of helping other people, given her a testimony, drawn her closer to Him and to people.
You have to learn to deal with both the good and the bad of life.
Actually, sometimes learning to deal with the good is harder. For instance, this past year, all of a sudden, when the book sold 15 million copies, it made me instantly very wealthy.
It also brought a lot of notoriety that I had never had to deal with before. I don't think God gives you money or notoriety for your own ego or for you to live a life of ease.
So I began to ask God what He wanted me to do with this money, notoriety and influence. He gave me two different passages that helped me decide what to do, II Corinthians 9 and Psalm 72.
First, in spite of all the money coming in, we would not change our lifestyle one bit. We made no major purchases.
Second, about midway through last year, I stopped taking a salary from the church.
Third, we set up foundations to fund an initiative we call The Peace Plan to plant churches, equip leaders, assist the poor, care for the sick, and educate the next generation.
Fourth, I added up all that the church had paid me in the 24 years since I started the church, and I gave it all back. It was liberating to be able to serve God for free.
We need to ask ourselves: Am I going to live for possessions? Popularity?
Am I going to be driven by pressures? Guilt? Bitterness? Materialism? Or am I going to be driven by God's purposes (for my life)?
When I get up in the morning, I sit on the side of my bed and say, God, if I don't get anything else done today, I want to know You more and love You better. God didn't put me on earth just to fulfill a to-do list. He's more interested in what I am than what I do.
That's why we're called human beings, not human doings..
Happy moments, PRAISE GOD.
Difficult moments, SEEK GOD.
Quiet moments, WORSHIP GOD.
Painful moments, TRUST GOD.
Every moment, THANK GOD..

God bless xxxx

Thursday, 19 March 2009

Frankie and Benny's

Still on the quest to being blogger of the year 2010!! lol (It's real by fire by force oo lol)

I really don't feel like blogging today but I must NOT relent! hehe

Went to Frankie and Benny's for the first time today...Had the meatball sub sandwich (abt £7.95)..I actually prefer Subway's and that costs me £1.99 on Tuesdays when its the sub of the day lol...Nevertheless, the atmosphere and decor was good..and when it was time to bring out the cake (it was a friend's birthday dinner by the way)it was oh so lovely..There's this thing they do whereby they turn off the lights and then play the "happy birthday" song...and you feel sooo special!! I loved it and I was not even the birthday girl....Definately worth having a birthday there!!

My stomach hurts as I write this now cause I ate when I got home as well and now I am "over-full"...Gluttony is a disease!

I am waiting for a call from a special somebody *big grin*
Thats all for today, I have tried ooooo

Good night people! God bless xxxxx

Tuesday, 17 March 2009

BLOGGER OF THE YEAR BY FIRE BY FORCE


Hiya blogville!

As usual, it's been ages! I haven't particularly left blogville, I have been quite present..only taking a back seat and discovering new and interesting/thought-provoking/funny/ingenious blogs..It has been a beautiful blogsperience :-) I can't remember fully all the really good ones but I would still say my lists would definately include:

Solomonsydelle
Linda Ikeji
Bellanaija
Oluwadee
Good Nigerian Girl
Nigerian Drama Queen
Overwhelmed Nigerian Babe
Christiana Rants
Bumight

(The list is not in any way exhaustive but mehn this bloggers can WRITE! They have re-inspired me to blog! The funny thing is the camaraderie thats exists in this little world known as blogville! The way they relate to each other makes it seem as if they knew each other well, yet for many of them, they are yet to have a one-on-one encounter)

For most of them, I got their info through the Naija bloggers awards... Their blogs are DEFINATELY worth a read.....
So, I have decided that by fire, by force, I must also be a nominee and eventually winner in next year's award hehe..

I thereby solemnly (try to) promise that:

- I would blog at least 3 times a week
- I would not be so obsessed about keeping my identity anonymous, thereby being free-er to talk about daily issues
- I would enjoy every bit of speaking my mind on the forum and not try to make my writing eligible for an Orange prize (that would come in due season lol)
- I would comment so frequently on other's blog that they would probably create another award category specailly for me "Commentator of the year".. and it shall even be a special recognition award.
- I would explore the wide range of "American wonder" that would enable my blog "shine and sparkle" e.g bright lights, pictures, videos, applications....be warned- you may find the blog quite addictive!

Hmmm..that's all I can think of for now....so join me in my quest to being blogger of the year 2010! It's not gonna be easy, I mean just take a look at my fellow contender's blogs *shudders*...I'm shaking!!....but BRING IT ON!!! lol

Peace, love and cocopops (sorry Christiana *wink*)
1 + the One

Saturday, 14 February 2009

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY

It's VALENTINE'S DAY!!!

Lol...I just feel it's appropriate to blog on a special day such as this :-) {Yeah right}

So how do you feel today?? Happy/Sad/Indifferent/Jumpy/Nervous/Expectant/Bitter/Wistful/Jealous/Holy (lol)/Naughty/Depressed/Fortunate.....

Hmm, I am actually not that sad hehehe. That would actually make me sad - feeling sad because it's valentine's day.. Why? Please! lol...

But yeah I know the day does hit people (single) HARDDDD!! But I hope you are able to see the beauty in everything today to distract you...Beauty of the sun, beauty of the little baby that's in the pram on your way out, beauty of having a family, beauty of erhmmm EVERYTHING! Beauty, beauty and more beauty!! (Please anything to take your mind off an acute sense of loneliness is accepted)

I lost someone close to me recently and he was buried yesterday Friday the 13th...I love and would miss him a lot! Just wanted to publicly acknowledge him and to say thank you God for a good old life well spent.... One of my worst fear is losing someone close to me, it's such a terrible thing but unfortunatley it's as sure as life itself. For everyone who has lost a loved one, may you receive God's comfort and the strength to carry on.

So, just a thought for today...Hope you enjoy every bit of "love is in the airism" and be pleasantly surprised!! xx

Tuesday, 10 February 2009

DATING RULES THEY NEVER TELL YOU!!

How goes it!!
It's your ever faithful erratic blogger lol.....at least I'm faithful at being very erratic :-)

The topic I want to blog about has been playing around in my head for a long time but my busy (lazy) lifestyle :-) has prevented me from doing so....

I have been thinking lately about past relationships and the things I would change/not do if I had to do it all again!! I wouldn't really say I regret them (oh well, is it not an unwritten rule never to regret past occurences even if the very thought of them make you CRIINGE! lol).....So the thing is; I kinda came up with my own personal dating dos and don'ts - Let's call it a sort off guide lol

*DISCLAIMER*
These are entirely my thoughts...some are personal experiences while others are observations (I haven't experienced EVERYTHING ). I'm sure a lot of you might be able to identify with some of them :-)...Welcome to a bit of my world, buckle uppppp hehehe.....


1. Don't go out with someone for the wrong reasons e.g your friends convince you to, you think "what the heck he would do", to convince people that you are really not gay, his friend is your friend's boyfriend so you might as well go for it.......you would most likely wind up being single again after about 2 days....

2. If he doesn't make you giggle silly, maybe he just isn't the one.

3. It is not possible for EVERY guy to "kinda like you"... It is just not practical. Because he smiled at you at the mall doesn't necessarily mean he wants to introduce you to his folks, neither is the fact that the other guy brushed past you mean he was on his way to purchase an engagement ring for you lol...You're hot but not THAT hot!


4. Don't say yes because he said that he cannot handle being "just friends" with you. It might shock you that he would use the same mouth later to say "we can still be friends".


5. Don't kill yourself over pleasing his sisters/brothers/mum....relatives in general if it's not altar-bound. Yes they love you now but they would also love the new girlfriend. It's nothing personal, he's their blood. Not to worry though, if you were really good, they would speak fondly of you at gatherings and you might even get one or two invitations to special occaisions (only snag is that you would have the pleasure of the "new" girl's company as well).


6. Do pay him compliments. Let him feel that he is a hunk/hot/gorgeous/stud/the best. Men also need affirmation even if they pretend like it does not matter.


7. Don't compare him to anybody especially if he comes up wanting. Not even the hot guy on TV whom you would probably never meet. Trust me, don't don't don't.


8. No matter how close or comfortable you become with him, always make an effort. Endeavour to look good as much as possible. No jumping trousers with white socks expecting unconditional love, he may just run out of supply.....


9. Do let him feel like a man, he's got an ego - deal with it! Allow him to pick the bills, buy you nice things, pay for stuff...Yes you have your money and all but let him....


10. Don't fall for a cheap-skate...If he is more than happy to have you pay for stuff more than necessary please don't "manage", find your square-root and FAST!!


11. Don't pick unnecessary fights so that you keep making up...Don't believe what the Mills and Boon books say....Fighting and making up is exciting but it gets pretty old and is a sure way of ending things quickly.


12. ...Same goes for arrogant and jealous guys. After a while, it becomes a burden and huge frustration.


13. Do state clearly at the beginning what your views on sex outside marrige is from the onset, don't assume that he knows.


14. If he doesnt share your views on pre-marital sex, don't expect that he would "endure" for you. He might do at first when the adrenaline is still pumping fresh but after a while, let's just say his patience might start to wear thin.


15. If he really loves and cares about you, he would define the relationship and not have "something" with you. He would proudly show you off and be "in a relationship" on facebook.


16. Don't be too shattered if he doesn't live up to full expectation all the time. He is human afterall.


17. Do play hard to get when it's necessary but not TOO hard. Forget the 21st century ideology, the thrill is in the chase.


18. If he is cheating on his girlfriend with you, sweetheart he would do the same with you if you end up together...this time it might be your sister or cousin he can't help falling in love with!


19. Do run away from a guy who tells you that him and his girlfriend are
"having problems" but he really "doesn't have the heart to break up with her" and "it's you he really wants" yet there's always a recently tagged picture of him and his girlfriend all lovey-dovey. Don't accept any excuses/reasons/explanations no matter how good they are...

20. Do show him frequent displays of affection. Let him know that he is special from the others and you really do care if he had a proper breakfast, lunch, dinner and midnight snack. When you go out together, pay him extra attention so that it is loud and clear that that's "YOUR MAN".


Oh well, that's what I have for today.....I have actually had fun writing but mehn I am getting kinda tired of visiting past memories lol
Whenever I remember anything I would surely put up a 2nd part....... All the best in your relationships!!
Above all, may God give us the wisdom to cater to the individual and peculiar needs of our better-halfs. May we revel in fulfilling and beautiful relationships to the glory of His name.....

Love youuuu loads xxxxxxxx