Hope you are all well..
Recently, I have learnt something interesting about relationships. It's funny that sometimes, the 'rejected stone' becomes the chief cornerstone.
What do I mean? Well I have come across some ladies or men who say they would rather die than be in a relationship with a particular person. Sometimes we raise our noses up at certain people and think to ourselves that it could and would and should never happen! We laugh even at the thought of it!
Alas! What happens then is that a few weeks/months/years down the line, we are singing a new tune and loving up to this same person we earlier laughed at!
You see, I understand that the older you get, the qualities you look for and desire in the opposite sex starts to change. When I was younger, I wanted the tall, dark, handsome, BAAAD, rude boi! I wanted someone with attitude and someone that was popular. As I have grown older (and hopefully wiser), baad bois don't do it for me anymore like that (I still like a good measure of swagger though!) but now, the inside of a man matters to me much more than the way he looks. Don't get me wrong, I still very much want a man who is very good-looking and charming but I wouldn't touch him with a 10-foot pole if he didn't have character!
For me, life has taught me that when a man treats you right, he becomes the most beautiful creature to you in the world! Even when no one sees it, you begin to look at him with the eyes of love, he appeals to your senses, he becomes attractive to you and you are able to respond to him romantically. I believe I can safely say the same for when a man finds a woman with an excellent character. You know, as I grow older, I have begun to understand more the phrase 'beauty is in the eye of the beholder'..
Another thing I also understand is that time, circumstances and age changes people. You see that 'swaggerless' individual you see today? In a few years he becomes the hot 'sturving' that others are running after. You see that doppy girl with the crooked teeth you see today? In a matter of time, she becomes the model chic that men are dying over! The years have matured them and they have come into their own. The experiences they have been through has made them 'metamorphosise' from the caterpillar they once were to the butterfly they are now. Age has fully completed their look. You know, if a mother saw her baby at 1 or 2 months old, she would probably say 'God forbid!' lol.. But when they have been fully formed for 9months, they become the cute, cuddly babies that everyone wants to carry.
There was this guy that had been asking my friend out for the LONGEST time! We used to laugh at him so much and when I want to tease my friend or get on her nerves, I would be like "You and X would get together" or "Why don't you just give him a chance" with my tongue firmly in cheek.. and she would just get so upset or laugh it off saying God forbid, even if he were the last man alive, etc.. For her, looks and image were priority and this guy at the time didn't seem to cut it at all... I remember once having a conversation with her and discussing about how it is possible to fall in love with him if they got to know each other better and she said she was very confident that it could and should and would never happen!
Well imagine my surprise and speechless state when she told me recently that they were in a relationship and had been together for a while! She spoke about him so glowingly and spoke about how she 'just realised' that he was a great person with a great heart... He was there for her during a difficult period and his unshakeable persistence with her through many boyfriends and laughter(s) (at his expense!) eventually melted her heart.... I was GOB-SMACKED!!!
Another friend of mine mentioned that when the man who was to become her husband asked her out, she burst laughing, thinking "You must have guts"... Now she is happily married to him and speaks so well of him..
The ways of God and His plans are soo far from ours that sometimes our limited vision cannot comprehend it and like Sarah we laugh...
But thank God for His mercies, cause even though we laugh He still unveils the treasure in the person and brings His will to pass. Nevertheless, we need to be careful as like Sarah, we may act or do something that has a long-lasting effect before we come to SEE what God sees!
God bless xx
May God give us the grace to SEE before we laugh..