Thursday, 19 December 2013

Celebrating!!

It's been too long!

How's everyone doing? Hope you're getting ready for the Christmas holiday?! I know I am! One of the best parts of course is the two weeks off from work starting from 'close of business' tomorrow woohoo!!!

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By the way, I am taking invitations to barbeques, parties, get-togethers - anywhere 'small chops' is guaranteed will do!

I heard some fantastic news over the weekend that has me in a celebratory mood! So I have this friend of mine who I was going to blog about some months back but procrastination said no smh..

We recently met and had until recently been merely acquaintances.. This changed when one day we got talking and she shared with me her very difficult emotionally/love-deprived childhood.. My heart reached out to her as she told me what she had to go through and how she never felt like she belonged.

She also shared the desire she had in meeting a God-ly man to make a home with. She is a very sweet person and loves God too! After our chat, we encouraged each other on God's faithfulness and how He knows how to take care of His own.

I also shared with her what I refer to as the '1-year' testimony in terms of marriage as I have seen God do in the lives of so many people (especially from reading on boundless.com) and then I have seen it happen right before me in the lives of my friends.. This is when God brings a man/woman, you meet, date, fall in love, get engaged and in some cases get married within a year! I desired that kind of testimony for her...

Well.. we got chatting on Saturday and she had earlier told me about this young man in her church who had started becoming 'friendly'.. So I was just going to ask about an update when at the same time she said "Oh by the way, L and I are now official...."...

Yup, you feel my joy and excitement! :-) God is good! She said she remembered the stories I shared with her on the 1-year testimony

So yes, I look forward to a wedding within the year! lol

Then also, a couple I know who have been trusting in God for the fruit of the womb for a while recently had a baby girl!!

My heart is full of gratitude to this amazing God!

Ladies and gentlemen, there's reason to celebrate because GOD IS GOOD! And you're up next in Jesus name!

PS.. I will be starting a new long over-due series very soon! Yippeee.. so, yeah, stay tuned! :-D xxxx

Monday, 9 December 2013

What to look out for in your future wife

So, today is another one for the fellas!

As I stated in previous posts HERE and HERE, I am committed to passing on useful relationship messages to our wonderful men where I have the opportunity.

I read this very nice post on a blog I recently discovered and will be sure visiting again www.goodguyswag.com (interesting name ey? + a blog particularly for guys! Yippeee! It is a treasure indeed and I recommend to every guy!). The post is titled 'The Wife List: 10 Qualities' suggesting qualities to look out for in a future wife and you can read original post HERE (There are actually a lot more great posts on there!)

Have you ever wondered, "How would I know?" "I don't want to make a mistake!".. Well here goes, hope you find it useful.

Ladies, as always there's also something in it for us to learn as I found myself reading the list and checking to see if I would have made the cut lol.. It's a good list.

Let me know what you think!

Well, I can sum up most of my friends’ lists right here: 1.Blonde, 2. Skinny, 3. Hot. A few others might include: she likes football, she drinks beer with my buds, and she’s at least a full C. No matter what I write below, that list isn’t going away for some of you guys.  We’re all stubborn, but we can also be authentic. Sometimes we have to learn the hard way.
Earlier this week, I wrote the article An Uncrafty Guy’s Guide to Making a Vision Board about keeping you visually focused on your dreams.  Should we be specific about the woman we want to marry?  Absolutely. However, make a list with long-term vision. Most of the characteristics we think we want in a wife aren’t ones that make for a good, lifelong relationship. They are characteristics of a woman we want for one night.
Just like character is the most important quality of a good guy, the woman you’re going to marry should have good character as well.  When you find her, she is more valuable than anything. Here are 10 qualities of good future wife material:
1.  She shares your beliefs
When it comes to finding your wife, I’ve heard “equally yoked.” It has nothing to do with weightlifting for those of you guys who like muscle women. Your potential wife should have the same beliefs you have. Now, you may think you can do some missionary dating, and turn that situation around so she will believe everything you do.  You’re probably going to be very disappointed with some bad side effects.  If you don’t have the same core beliefs….good luck.
2.  She makes you a better man
If everyday is hell with her, that should be a red flag. Your potential wife should elevate you to Yourself 2.0. You can get a good idea from your friends and family. Do they say you act differently in a bad way when you are around her? Not a good sign.  She should bring out the best in you, not bring out heartache and frayed nerves.
3.  She’s trustworthy
In fact, she should inspire trustworthiness within you. If you don’t trust her, you’re probably making her as bitter as you’re making yourself. Not worth it. If you can’t trust her, maybe you’re not ready to date her or maybe you need to work on confidence issues within yourself. If there’s good reason not to trust her, don’t even go there. Just like any cheater, it’s bound to happen again.
4.  She has ambition
She should have strength in character and carry herself with confidence. As a man, you should be the leader in the relationship, but for any dictators who feel justified here; we’re talking servant leadership. You probably don’t want the consummate follower either. She should have plans too. In fact, she should be a hard worker just like you. That doesn’t mean having a job is a requirement. One of my friends is a stay-at-home wife with three kids, and she works harder than any of my friends with careers.
5.  She’s selfless
She should care about others. Look at the way she treats her family and her friends. If she’s not close with her family, and doesn’t have any good friends, that’s not a good sign. If you start dating her, much less marry her, you will discover why soon enough. Some questions to ask yourself: Does she care about causes? Does she go out and volunteer? Does she give change to the needy or buy them a meal? These are important characteristics to consider.
6.  She’s attractive
In your eyes, she should be a “10.” When my wife walks in the room, I’m awestruck by her every time. She’s beautiful from the inside out. However, I’ve dated “hot” girls who ended up being downright ugly by the time we broke up. Personality plays into attractiveness big-time. Just remember, “charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting.” She should be beautiful down to her soul because that kind of beauty lasts forever.
7.  She’s smart
You’re going to be spending a lot of time with her, so she should be able to hold a good conversation. She should be wise, smart, and give you good advice. Her women’s intuition should be strong. I look to my wife all the time for advice. She’s collected all sorts of wisdom from her mom. She remembers everything. Yes, everything….maybe too much.
8.  She loves you unconditionally
If she’s trying to change you to be another person, it’s time to move on. Your future wife should love you just as you are, regardless of anything you’ve done in your past. There will be minor adjustments along the way, but if she nags you about your core characteristics, it won’t get any better in marriage.
9.  She’s responsible
Does she remember appointments and meetings? Does she flake all of the time? She should already do a good job of managing her own life. If she’s got loads of debt and doesn’t work, you’re going to be taking all of that on. Ultimately, she will have some part in your financial well-being, and guess what? Finances remain one of the leading causes of divorce.
10.  She gets along with your family and friends
If she doesn’t even try to connect with your family and/or friends, let her go. She shouldn’t be critical of the people who you love and have been loyal to you throughout your life. There might be cases where your mom doesn’t like your future wife, and that may require your intervention; but in general, she should be a good fit with the people in your life. Marriage is a joining of two lives that existed prior to meeting the other person.
When it comes down to it, you know what you can handle. Love can overwrite any of the qualities above, but having these qualities will certainly make your lives easier once you are married. No one’s perfect. Even with this list, both of you are still going to bring some kind of baggage into the relationship. Make sure premarital counseling is a huge priority once you find her. My wife and I did a relationship bootcamp in addition to premarital counseling. One session just doesn’t cut it. Throw everything but the kitchen sink at the most important decision you will ever make.

PS Seen a girl you like but don't know how to win her heart? Please check out this post as well from the blog '10 ways to win a girl's heart' - Thank me later :-)

Friday, 6 December 2013

White Christmas in Lagos!

Tuesday was OFF THE CHAIN!!!!!!!!

I started my Christmas in styleee yo!

So, for those who follow me on twitter @1plustheone, you may have seen me mention on my TL that the RCCG City of David Christmas Musical Concert '13 was the place to be on Tuesday the 3rd of December.. If you were not there, the only thing I have to say to you is "You should have listened to me!!"

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It was simply magnificent! WOW!

I know City of David has excellence embedded in its framework but this was just so superb!

Initially, when I saw the invitation card and I read 'White Christmas'.. In my mind I was like "Hmm.. White Christmas in Nigeria.. ermm there's a reason why it's referred to as 'white' Christmas oh!" but I thought let me not under-estimate this people..

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When my friends and I got to the venue, the first thing I noticed was the place teeming with people!  I was like huh? Have I just dulled myself by not arriving earlier? Would I have to sit outside in the overflow and not get a live view?!! I also noticed that they seemed to be fascinated by the car-park for some reason which I didn't quite understand.. Until I saw the white top of what looked like a large tent.. When I saw the FULL picture, I almost squealed to myself in delight!! Wowieeeeeeeeee!

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The car-park had been transformed into a picturesque Winter wonderland!!! I was soooo excited! The tent was all white with re-creations of ice and snow! Honestly it looked so beautiful! Like a movie-set! I had to mentally applaud the sheer creativity! I was like "Yeahhh.. They promised a White Christmas, we sure got one!".

Next, I saw what was a pre-concert cocktail with small chops (light refreshments) and mixed drinks being served to all - and there was a crowd! At this point, all I wanted to ensure was that I was able to secure a good seat! (I sadly missed out on the food *sob sob*) So I walked quickly upstairs to the hall and waited with other fellow enthusiasts to run get into the room as soon as doors were opened..

Now, the concert itself.. I don't quite have words enough to describe what was a very well produced, fully entertaining, blessed and joyous evening.. (I spent Wednesday evening at home re-living the evening through videos I recorded!). The voices were just divine.. There was a buffet of traditional Christmas carols, an infusion of jazz-y carol, Christmas carol with a Nigerian twist (loved the animal song and the lead vocalist was OMGoodness!), carols in languages that existed before my fore-fathers! It was simply amazing!

One of my favourite Christmas songs is 'Oh Holy Night' and I was hoping they would do it but was disappointed that it wasn't listed in the programme of events. However, a young lady was introduced to play the violin (I loveee violins by the way!) and we were told that she would be playing Oh holy night.. I was a bit cheered up but I thought I would have preferred it being sung UNTIL she played! Wow!!! Honestly God has truly bestowed talents on His children. She played accompanied by the piano and it was breath-taking..Some people had to give her a standing ovation when she finished!

And how can I forget the comperes! The comedian was particularly hilarious! Haha.. My friend laughed till tears came..
We also had a surprise visit from Santa bearing chocolates and sweets for all with imitations of snow flakes being gently released from the gallery! The children were delighted! And of course the *cough cough* child in me  was jumping inside :-D

There was a very brief but powerful message by Pastor Bamidele Sturdivant on the theme of the evening 'Live to Love'.. I loved his message on doing something this season for someone who cannot repay you. We are reminded of God's love this season in giving the ultimate sacrifice. Love is about doing not just saying.. So just do it! And do it now!

It was a truly wonderful evening and my invited guests kept saying "Thank you for inviting me"

Now guess what we rounded off the evening with!!!? FIREWORKS!!

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*Aside* (I saw someone's tweet saying "Please can someone tell me what's happening around the VI area, I can hear loud explosions) - Clearly, we don't  feel safe enough yet to have unannounced fireworks LOL.. Things will get better..

So now that I have made you sufficiently jealous that you weren't there hehehe.. Next time, please listen when I invite you for an event - it probably would be awesome! :-D

You can follow me @1plustheone or follow @RCCGCityofDavid to be able to know about fresh and exciting events happening all year round!

Next stop.. Who's going for THE Experience? Don't be a LASTma(n). Tonight at TBS, 7pm with a HOST of amazing worship leaders! For more info http://theexperiencelagos.com/portal/



After that, we dive straight into the RCCG Holy Ghost Congress - 9th - 14th of December, 7pm daily at the Redemption Camp 'The Overflow'! Oh la la.. December is going to be liveee!



Let's go thereeee!